Staying Calm and Thriving in Tough Times
The last 5 months have been a significant challenge for us all.
In times of adversity and loss, remaining calm and finding the positive in each day can seem nigh on impossible.
So what can we do to help ourselves in these uncertain and anxious times?
One source of inspiration for me during lockdown, has been a series of wonderful online talks from Action for Happiness (www.actionforhappiness.org). In one recent talk, psychologist and author Dr Maria Sirois shared the following tips to help us build resilience and thrive in the face of adversity on a daily basis:
Begin every day with 3 self-care questions:
i) What can I do today to nourish myself?
ii) What can I do today to strengthen myself?
iii) What can I do today to inspire myself?
During the day celebrate small gains and remember the ‘AND’
Give yourself permission to do less, to rest, to fall apart whenever you need to but notice and celebrate any progress you have made, no matter how insignificant it might seem.
If you are feeling distressed/guilty/angry/upset, remember the ‘AND’. So, for example, you may think to yourself ‘I’m feeling upset because I can’t seem to get anything done at the moment’. Dr Sirois suggests you complete this phrase by adding a positive (but TRUE) ‘AND’ such as ‘AND I know that every day I just do my best’ or ‘AND I’ve still managed to keep chipping away at the big things’ etc.
At the end of the day, look for the good
At night, every night, ask yourself ‘What was the best moment today?’ Then savour it. There will always be one good moment every day.
Meanwhile, you might also find it useful to regularly take time to reflect on other difficult times you have experienced: and to think about how you handled them/coped with them/survived them.
Give yourself permission to feel however you feel. Forgive yourself for being human.
But when you’re ready, look for meaning. Ask yourself: ‘Who might I be at my best in this difficult time’.